Last week, the United Kingdom had its general election, which resulted in a parliamentary majority for the Conservatives.  Even though more people voted Tories than anyone else, this rendered a few people on a certain side of the political compass sore because government is mostly represented by a party they loathe.  To express their bitterness, they — mostly students — headed to London to cry some more on the streets and cause a ruckus.

These left-winged boneheads are upset over two things; austerity and the lack of proportional representation, which go hand-in-hand in this instance.  Two days into David Cameron being sworn in again and way before his party put any mandate forward, they were already on the streets in protest because ‘63.1% didn’t vote for austerity/Conservatives [delete as appropriate]’ even though that’s a barefaced lie.

It’s 20%, at most, actually.

The fact of the matter is, the people of the UK voted for right-wing austerity.  When you add up the votes of each of the main two conservative parties in Great Britain and Northern Ireland, their combined total is 50.6%.  Let’s break it down to make it simpler:-

• Conservative Party: 11,334,920 (36.9%)
• UK Independence Party: 3,881,129 (12.6%)
• Democratic Unionist Party: 184,260 (0.6%)
• Ulster Unionist Party: 114,935 (0.4%)

There you have it, that’s 15,515,244 of the 30,691,680 voters who went for those four parties.  I’m excluding any right-leaning minor parties and independents, who would only make that figure larger, trying to categorise the ideologies of each candidate who stood will take forever so let’s keep it simple, at least doing so already proves these people wrong.  This figure also discounts austerity measures that the Labour Party wanted to put in place, it’s all bitterness from those who think ‘fairness’ is always getting their way.  Their right to protest is based on the fact that simple maths goes against their agenda.

Oh look, now they’re protesting on behalf of those who chose not to vote, like that’s the Tories’ fault — including budding Tory voters.

What I find strange is that never in the history of British general elections has anyone cried about the election result being unfair, not when Labour won the 2005 election with a parliamentary majority with less of the popular vote, not even at the last one where the government had to be a compromise of two parties with contrasting philosophies.  It is all coming off as sour grapes from the left side, those who are upset that they aren’t being represented.

The Liberal Democrat voters of 2010 were probably happy that their party were in government, or so be it propping up the Conservatives to give them more seats.  What made the LibDems popular last time round was their failed pledge to abolish tuition fees and look how that ended up, it took six months since the coalition was formed for anti-government protests to begin, after cuts were made, not two days after government was re-formed and the cabinet minister roles were yet to be decided.

It’s hard to obtain official data but most of these protesters do appear to be young, namely students and possibly first-time voters.  Much like Egypt after Hosni Mubarak was ousted, democracy is a new concept to them, they think overthrowing any fairly-elected government they don’t like is how it works.  These young people are very naive, they are very influenced by gimmicks and are swayed by ill-thought-out biased populism.  They automatically assume that the left is good and the right is bad, without into account their own actions.

‘I don’t like it but I have to go along with it.’

In 2010, it was the LibDems who won their hearts, they were seen as a cool and hip alternative to the Labour Party and look how that ended up, although Labour still wouldn’t have won a majority if the students opted for them instead.  This time, it’s the Green Party who are the “trendy” ones and are appealling to the young electorate.  Wanting to nationalise every single public service and lower taxes, recouping the costs by charging carrier bags £1 each and using the age-old method of rigorously taxing bankers, who’ll either find more loopholes or permanently jetset to a tax haven.

Unsurprisingly, the Greens are very popular among students and a significant chunk of those who voted in the last election opted for the LibDems.  There’s a reason why these people are still in education, they still have a lot more learning to do.  A part of me does want the Greens to win, purely to see how catastrophic it will be, everyone knows how bad it would be and that’s why they have never been a prominent force anywhere in the world.  The philosophy of the Greens is that money does grow on trees, but it just so happens that those trees are a protected species and nobody’s allowed near them.

A massive red herring that these berks have fallen for is the Tory plan to abolish the Human Rights Act, they think the UK is going to turn into a tyrannic dictatorship and they’re going to be silenced, which is hugely ironic when you consider the current circumstances.  The current legislation has massive loopholes in it which are exploited by the likes of Islamic fundamentalist Abu Qatada, who used the act to try and indefinitely postpone his deportation from the country but no, they’re deliberately ignoring these acts of legislative abuse.  This mess does sum up the mentality of them, more worried about the wellbeing and concerns of radical Muslims than those of the general public.

Suppressing the opposition is within their own right to protest, apparently.

Another issue that these morons are protesting is how unfair the first-past-the-post electoral system is, calling for proportional representation to be the method used for parliament.  It’s a bit late to cry for electoral reform right after an election, you’re going to have to wait another five years before it’s put into effect.  As I alluded to earlier, this is the first time that the current system has caused such a fuss and it’s peculiar that it coincided with the UK’s first absolute Conservative government in 23 years.  There weren’t these anti-democratic protests when Labour won with a lower majority of 35.2% in 2005, or when the ConDem coalition was formed five years ago.

We had an Alternative Vote referendum in 2011 to change the voting system, that was overwhelmingly rejected by the British public with 67.9% opting for ‘no’.  The protesters were probably too young to remember or even know about the people choosing to maintain the status quo, it’s easy to be naive and ignorant when clichéd, anti-establishment populism can rot your brain so easily.  It’s no different to comedy to some extent; you’re playing on the ignorance of your audience for support, the main difference being the audience know the comedian isn’t being serious.  Granted, some on the right feel underrepresented via FPTP but at least they’re being civil about it.

In protesting on behalf of the ‘63.1%’, these li’l rebels are inadvertently supporting the party they absolutely loathe — UKIP, who make up a fifth of that percentage.  They are the very same party that these tearaways are more concerned about not getting into government than the ones they support getting into it, with some going as far as disrupting peaceful UKIP rallies and even smashing their offices, hypocritically spray painting ‘Nazi scum’ on the outside as they flee the scene.  That’s how much these kids support democracy,  I respect bone idle no-voters to a much higher regard than these spiteful tactically-voting shits.

Both sides have a problem with the current system but one of them is being sensible about it.

What’s funny is that these wannabe hippies/communists think that they’re not being taken seriously but when they behave like this, this reasoning is completely justified.  Because they recently left home, they think they’re free from the shackles of authority and can now do whatever they please, whether that be fighting against what was fairly wanted by the people.

The lack of extensive news coverage of the protests is also pissing them off, they want the world to know of this feeble attempt at an uprising but the media outlets aren’t having any of it.  It’s all for good reason as well, no one is buying their cries for attention and not having wall-to-wall coverage of a bunch of whingy students with entitlement issues is a blessing in disguise for them, less people know how idiotic they are being.

I would support increasing the voting age to keep this pseudo-revolutionaries at bay, they’re far too naive and immature to accept that everything can’t go their way.  Either that or move the election to mid-March so it doesn’t coincide with the end of their semesters.  Like some in Scotland after the independence referendum last autumn, they want another vote for the very slim chance it may go their way — keep on rinse and repeating until it eventually happens, that’s how democracy works after all.  You are not ‘sticking it to the man’, you are extremely sore losers.

This thing has been around for as long as we were able to communicate, make something more extravagant than it really is.  We do it everyday and I’ve been a victim of this, with it being made out I caused an episode in a Bradford branch of Chicken Cottage when all what happened was I ordered the same meal as someone else but with different drinks, he inadvertently took my dinner so I took his when it came and then swapped drinks.  It does miff me when someone makes glaring historical errors when recalling stories involving me or where I was a witness, I’m always there to save the day and right the wrong.

On the other side of the coin, there is presenting bullshit as fact and doing it in such a manner that people will buy into it.  Unfortunately that is quite commonplace, where no one questions the authenticity of something that seems rather extravagant and dubious.  Sometimes the bullshit is glaring right in front of you but it’s bizarre how many tread into it, other times it is in your face but you need to do a bit of work to truly smell the fishiness.  The latter is the case with “statistics”; it can be stated that 1 in 9 so-and-so, with the figures laid out underneath but when you work out the mean (the true average), the total comes closer to 1 in 5.  The issue there is the “stats” have been broken down and presented so people automatically assume the source is verifiable, also they don’t have the time or a calculator handy to do the arithmetic themselves.

It’s the European elections next month and the talk of the town has been the United Kingdom Independence party, UKIP.  All year the news outlets have been slating them and branding them this, that or the other because one of their members did this, that or the other.  So what?  We know they’re conservative Brits and therefore politically incorrect.  This week has been an eventful one for them; their new poster campaign has been deemed racist and hypocritical as one featured an Irishman — whose rights in the UK are determined by UK law and not EU law unlike with the Poles etc, a star in their latest video dissed Islam and someone else in their crew said Dudley-born hotel salesman Lenny Henry should go to a black country.  Henry said that there should be more black faces in the media and I think the UKIP bloke has a point there, this is a natively white country after all.

Why there should be more black people in the media.

The general public has been jumping on board the anti-UKIP bandwagon, well the loony left who are all for democracy and free speech, just as long as you share their ideologies.  One group I did find is Hope Not Hate who are so pathetically against them, they come up with the most ludicrous “facts” and statistics like they’re making a point.  Couple of those “points” were that UKIP MEPs hardly vote in the European parliament, the institution they are against and want to gain autonomy from and that they voted against combating tax evasion one time they didn’t abstain, as they vote against everything in protest against laws being made in Brussels instead of Westminster.

The loonies are always picking on a selection of their UK policies and some they made up themselves, which have little bearing in the party’s European pursuit.  People tend to be more radical at the European elections but are more civil in the general elections, I would vote BNP in the Euros but never in the nationals and locals.  Hope Not Hate say that they’re fighting against “racism” in politics but what have those examples got to do with ethnicity or creed?  These people are incredibly bitter, they can’t accept that others agree with UKIP’s policies and are instead shouting ‘racist’ at them, flexing their own fascist muscles.  They are the same people who think the British parliament should reflect the ethnic diversity of the country, which is a fucking shit idea.  Go to your country of origin if you want your race to be properly represented in government, stop moving to others and expecting to be given a slice of the cake.

Everyone laughed at UKIP when 26 million Bulgarians and Romanians didn’t arrive at Heathrow at the start of the year when all what the party did was note how many unemployed people there are in the EU sans Croatia, seeing that the UK became an Eastern European hotspot in 2004, not suggest how many will come over.  Europhiles are under the illusion that a UK outside the EU will fall back into the Stone Age and be isolated from the world, oblivious to massive economies like Japan and the USA not needing to be members of a power-sapping supernational economic union to be successful.

Their poster is racist, they’re burning our national flag.

Prime Minister David Cameron courted faux controversy by calling the UK a Christian country, which it is last time I checked.  England is Anglican, Scotland is Presbyterian, Wales was part of the Kingdom of England and Northern Ireland is split Catholic and Protestant.  The Queen is the head of the Church of England so what’s the deal?  Perhaps a meal wouldn’t be made out of it if Asians integrated into society and don’t isolate themselves and their many kids from it.  I live in a place full of Asians and one of them always shouts at her children, a horrible noise comes out of her not too dissimilar to that of Alien.  I think she has been impregnated by one and its spawn is going to crawl out of her mouth whilst she’s making that noise and’ll wreak terror in the ‘hood.

It’s just as bad in the sports world; Jack Wilshere was branded a racist last year for saying that the England football team should be for English players, which nobheads would refute that?  It defeats the point of international football if it was like club football or Qatar, buying players willy nilly and having a seemingly unlimited pool to choose from.  This all came about because England manager Roy Hodgson is misguided on the eligibility rules, he thought then-18 year old Belgian-born Kosovar-Albanian Adnan Januzaj could one day be capped for the Three Lions and the English population took his word for it.  He’s only been here for almost 3 years now, when the four UK associations have an agreement that players must have been born in, have at most a grandparent from or at least five years education by age 18 in any of the home nations before they are eligible for that particular one.

Let’s want Britain to be about British.

I thought this was settled when Scotland tried to cap Spaniard Nacho Novo, or when England tried to cap Spaniards Mikel Arteta and Manuel Almunia, or when Wales tried to cap Spaniard Angel Rangel.  They all failed because they aren’t British, nor are their parents nor their schools.  Blame Hodgson for being thick, not Wilshere for saying it how it was.  I think that it is dying down now in the UK, seeing English people represent Wales because their great gran once spent a weekend in Aberystwyth.  English-born pundits like Andy Townsend, Mick McCarthy and Mark Lawrenson — who were all too shit to play for England so chose Ireland — don’t know their own nationality; they still pretend to be Irish but call themselves English, I guess it depends on which one’s more fashionable at the time.

When the FA put the new England shirts on sale the other week, everyone was crying that they were £90, completely ignoring the fact that was the price of the player-specification shirts and not the replica.  Being a Man United fan, I know that Nike have been doing that quite a lot in recent years, even selling mislabelled “authentic” player-issue shirts in a neat box for £90.  Mislabelled as the proper match issued shirts shouldn’t have any labels in them at all, the wash care symbols should be heat pressed inside the shirt.  To add insult to injury and some irony to proceedings, there were times that season where United players wore replicas in matches as stocks were running low, more so when the season was reaching its climax.

At the Old Trafford museum, they hang up replica shirts in the dressing room outside matchdays so we know where each player sits, Dave the tour guide told us that the matchday shirts are far more rugged than the replicas.  Surely it should be the opposite, they only get worn for 45 minutes before never seeing the light of day again, replicas — if bought by Sunday League footballers — go through more hustle and bustle.  The worst thing is that Nike shirts are made from EIGHT plastic bottles, which are pennies to produce.  You can buy good quality unauthorised replica shirts on the online black market, they’re around £12 so you’re not getting ripped off unlike with “authentic” replicas.

Contradicting my claim from two years ago by 46.666666666666664%, I am really sorry about misleading you.

There was another football-related shitstorm last year that everyone has now forgotten about because it was a massive non-story, which was Kyle Walker inhaling laughing gas.  You get laughing gas in whipped cream and I have a canister of that in the fridge, am I a hardline druggie now?  Laughing gas is nitrous oxide, nitrogen and oxygen are the two most abundant elements in the earth’s atmosphere so what’s the deal?  Medical professionals use the stuff to ease the pain of patients, I think it’s that the press want to shame someone for blowing bullshit out of proportion and hoping the gullible will buy into it.  What next, name and shame people taking hydrous oxide?

It’s like all this internet spying nonsense; we know our internet providers and IT technicians in buildings monitor our web activity but when a news outlet spins it because a website does all that, there’s a fucking outrage.  It is a sad state of affairs when people actually do fall for that shite and get caught up in this hysteria.  Give it all a week before everyone is bored and it’s forgotten about, when the rags witch hunt another high-profile person for being a racist, antisemitic Islamophobe because they ate a bacon butty — with everyone else who does it also being scums of the earth and will contract cancer from looking at it.

Living in the digital age does have its upsides — there are so many more channels at our disposal and none of them have to fulfill a news output quota so you can stick to them and can abstain from the news for weeks, all your worries about ’70s paedophilia and terrorists blowing each other up in an irrelevant land are forgotten about.  Games consoles are heavily dependent on being connected to the internet which has drastically increased their replay value, from the longevity of games to streaming services of a vast catalogue of films and TV shows.  Until you watch the news again, you realise how much you don’t give a fuck about current affairs.